Vampire Vs Werewolf
by StrangeNormality
Summary: Just a bunch of short drabbles of Edward and Jacob.
1. Scooby VS Dracula

_Vampire Vs. Werewolf_

_Scooby Doo vs. Dracula _

Edward walked into his kitchen. But then he saw a person he absolutely despised, Jacob Black, his head stuck

in the refrigerator.

"What the hell are you doing in my house?"

"Idk."

"Well get out. And whats with the text-talk?"

"No. And Idk"

"Cut it out, and get OUT of my house!"

"Uh. This is Bella's house too and she wants me here."

Jacob walked out of the kitchen and sat right on his couch with his large load of food and immediately turned on the television.

"You have absolutely no respect for this house."

"Psh. Yeah I do."

"Hm. let's see, you come and go when ever you feel like, you steal our food. Oh and You set my mattress on fire."

"So? You don't need it!"

"That still doesn't give you the right to set it on fire."

"Oh, be quiet, Dracula."

" I'd rather be Dracula than Scooby Doo, you mutt."

"Well, does Dracula have one of the greatest shows ever?"

"No, but it isn't one of the greatest books ever." he defended.

"Who cares about books? TV rocks."

"Books are better. And so is Dracula."

"No. Scooby is better. He is like awesome, dude. Much better than some stupid bloodsucking, nasty vampire."

"Id rather be a bloodsucking vampire than a DOG!" he said emphasising the word, dog.

"Duh. Cuz you are one, moron."

"Why are we even having this discussion? I am a mature married man and i refuse to stoop down to your immature level."

"A little uptight there are we, Drac?"

"Shut up!"

"No."

"GET OUT!"

"I don't wanna."

"Why not? you have your own house!"

"Not anymore."

"What are you talking about."

"I accidentally shot my TV with an arrow and it brokeded."

"That's not even a word. And how did you 'Accidentally' shoot an arrow through your tv?"

"Well, there was an apple on top of it, and i shot at it, and well...I...uh...missed."

"You're an idiot"

---

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**I know it's stupid but I was bored. :) lol**

**reviews much appreciated**


	2. Your mattress is comfy!

**Vampire VS. Werewolf**

_Your Mattress is comfy_

"Jacob, what the hell are you doing??"

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm jumping on your mattress"

"I can see that."

"Then why'd you ask, moron?"

"_Why _are you on my bed?"

"I don't know. It's comfy."

"Get off."

"Mm. No."

"Yes. And get out of my house!"

"Psh. You can't tell me what to do."

"Oh, yes I can"

"Nuh-uh"

"Stop jumping on the bed Jake."

"You sound like my dad."

"Ugh. I cannot stand you. I wish you would just GO AWAY and never come back."

"Aw. Come on. You know you love me!"

"Yeah right."

"Oh no." he puts his hands over his heart, faking a heart attack and falls off the bed.

"Jacob, come on that is not funny."

"......."

"Jacob get up now."

"........"

"Jacob??"

"Jake??"

"JAKE?!"

"Oh no."

Then he gets up. "HAHA I FOOLED YOU!!! I KNEW IT!"

"That wasn't funny. You scared me."

"Ha. I knew it! I knew it! I knew it!!"

"You knew what?"

"You care about mee!!"

" No I don't"

"Uh-huh!"

"I was thinking of Bella and Nessie!"

"M-hm. You care about your son-in-law."

"You are not my son-in-law."

"Nope. But I will be."

"."

"Whatever..."

"Hm. Your mattress is very comfortable."

"Get off, you stupid mutt."

"Why?"

"Because I said so."

"Are you sure your not my dad?"

"I'm sure."

"Whatever. But i'm not getting off the bed"

–

**This was horrible and boring, I know. But I hope you liked it anyway. Review please.**

**:))  
**


	3. Questions

Vampire Vs. Werewolf

"Hey Ed?"

"Jacob, my name is not Ed, it is Edward."

"Okay. So, Eddie, I have something to ask you."

"And what might that be?"

"Why do you have a weird accent?"

"Why do I have a weird accent?"

"Well, yeah sure I guess."

"I don't have an accent."

"Yeah you do. Its like weird."

"Yeah, whatever."

"How many hot dogs can you eat in 1 hour?"

"Jacob..."

"What?"

"I can't eat."

"Could you eat a bunch of hot dogs if you wanted to?"

"Yes but why would I want to?"

"Because hot dogs rock"

"Not really."

"I can like eat 125 hot dogs in an hour."

"Well, your like an eating machine."

"Nuh-uh."

"Yeah you are."

"Do you like black?"

"Why?"

"Are you like, Gothic?"

"Do I look Gothic?"

"No, but you act like it."

"How?"

"I don't know."

"Do you like puppies?"

"NO!"

"What's wrong with puppies?"

"Well for starters, I have one who won't get out of my house. He's obnoxious, and wont quit asking me questions!"

"Dude, you have a talking dog in here?"

"I'm talking about you, dimwit!"

"Fine, then."

"..........................................................."

"Do you like Chinese food?"

"Go fall off a cliff, Jacob!"

–

**I hope you liked it.**

**I couldn't come up with a new idea so I just wrote down a bunch a **

**crap. Lol**

**:))**


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